Most of you know that my father passed away at the end of May. Since then, my mother has spent a LOT of time with us at our house. She lives about 40 miles away, but will spend three or four days with us about every five days. We have a spare bedroom that she's using, but right now, it's not quite "homey" for her, as it's a "spare" bedroom.
We have two trundles in there, from our old daybeds, and that's what she and my dad used to sleep on when they'd visit and whatever sheets and blankets we had available, but nothing special, and I want mom to be comfortable here. Currently, mom is on one trundle, and her dog is on the other. She's using sheets and blankets that we have available.
This Christmas is going to be difficult, to say the least. I know she doesn't want anything, except for the holidays to be over. However, we're going to be spending Christmas with my brother and his wife, and want to share some "small" gifts with each other, and we're not sure what to get for our mother.
Mom has finally started leaving some stuff here at our house so that she doesn't have to think about bringing it every time, so she's getting used to spending time here. I want her to be as comfortable as possible, and feel "at home" as much as she can.
I was thinking that it might be nice to get a set of bedding for her for her bed here at our house. A nice, thick comforter (we keep the heat a little lower than what she's used to) and some cozy sheets.
She doesn't want anything for Christmas, and doesn't really need anything, so I was trying to think of something she could use and enjoy, but wouldn't buy for herself.
Mom is very practical, so the "practicality" of the gift is not a big deal.
What do you think? Any other thoughts on what we could get for mom?
Hi, Julie
We also have my mother living with us part time. Your ideas sound great. A suggestion: You might get together some family photos, frame them and make a nice picture wall for her to enjoy. My mom also likes a nice stuffed Teddy Bear to cuddle with.
Julie, I think your bedding idea is a great one - welcoming, warm and loving! This will also be my first Christmas without my beloved DH, and I know it's going to be hard. If my situation was the same as yours, I would love the bedding gift.
I recently went out a replaced my sheets with some that were quite decadent, along with a new comforter. I spent too much money, but it was worth every last penny! Every night I wrap myself in luxury and think about the good memories.
Not sure what your price range is, but how about as her "gift", having her help you redecorate the room in colors and fabrics that she likes. Maybe a new paint color in the room and some bedding / curtains to match, with a very nice photo of your dad (or the two of them together in a happy moment) in a beautiful frame on the nightstand or dresser.
Agree with all the ideas above, especially the picture. If you've got the time, I would put a small album together as well. Part of the healing process is recounting the good times. Difficult at first but when the happy memories come back it starts to ease the pain. The ultimate gift would be having her come live with you but that's not a decision to be taken likely, nor do I have any idea if it's something either of you could handle.
Julie, get her a heated mattress pad, we have one and we love it. Try overstock.com that's where I bought about four of them a month ago for Christmas gifts.
Life is what happens to you, while you are busy making other plans. "John Lennon"
Keep all the amenities in that room. Tissues, fan, magazines, flannel sheets, bedside lamp, slippers and Robe, toiletries like bubble bath and oils, Candle, electric blanket!
I would spend a lot of time out of the house this holiday. Make some NEW memories that you never did with her husband beforelike eat at new resturants, go see the Christmas Lights at the Zoo, or attend a Christmas choir concert, or see The Nutcracker Suite. ANything new and unusual that isn't associated with Dad. Next year she will have new independant memories to think about.
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