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Open Roads Forum  >  RV Pet Stop

 > A Dogs Prayer

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Shotgun

CA

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Posted: 03/18/06 07:42pm Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

TO: GOD:

FROM: THE DOG



Dear God: Why do humans smell the flowers, but seldom, if ever, smell one another?

Dear God: When we get to heaven, can we sit on your couch? Or is it still the same old story?

Dear God: Why are there cars named after the jaguar, the cougar, the mustang, the colt, the stingray, and the rabbit, but not ONE named for a d! og? How often do you see a cougar riding around? We do love a nice ride! Would it be so hard to rename the "Chrysler Eagle" the " Chrysler Beagle"?

Dear God: If a dog barks his head off in the forest and no human hears him, is he still a bad dog?

Dear God: We dogs can understand human verbal instructions, hand signals, whistles, horns, clickers, beeper s, scent ID's, electromagnetic energy fields, and Frisbee flight paths. What do humans understand?

Dear God: More meatballs, less spaghetti, please.

Dear God: Are there mailmen in Heaven? If there are, will I have to apologize?

Dear God: Let me give you a list of just some of the things I must remember to be a good dog.

1. I will not eat the cats' food before they eat it or after they throw it up.

2. I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc., just because I like the way they smell.

3. I will not munch on "leftovers" in the kitty litter box, although they are tasty.

4. The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.

5. The sofa is not a 'face towel'. Neither are Mom and Dad's laps.

6. The garbage collector is not stealing our stuff.

7. My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

8. I will not bite the officer' s hand when he reaches in for Mom's driver's license and registration.

9. I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the toilet

10. Sticking my no! se into someone's crotch is an unacceptable way of saying "hello".

11. I don't need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm under the coffee table.

12. I must shake the rainwater out of my fur before entering the house - not after.

13. I will not throw up in the car.

14. I will not come in from outside and immediately drag my butt.

15. I will not sit in the middle of the living room and lick my crotch when we have company.

16. The cat is not a 'squeaky toy' so when I play with him and he makes that noise, it's usually not a good thing.

And, finally, My last two questions . . .


Dear God: Why do humans only ha ve 10 Commandments and dogs have 16?



P.S. Dear God: When I get to Heaven may I have my testicles back?


Hunting is not a hobby. It is much more life sustaining than that.
Dale-pilot, Jeanette-co-pilot
Electrician since 1978



2003 30' Sprinter 5er
2001 Dodge CTD


Chuck&Gail

In the Colorado Mountains

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Posted: 03/18/06 07:54pm Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Funny!!!


Chuck
Wonderful Wife
Australian Shepherd
2010 Ford Expedition TV
2010 Outback 230RS Toybox, 5390# UVW, 6800# Loaded
Not yet camped in Hawaii, 2 Canada Provinces, & 2 Territories
I can't be lost because I don't care where this lovely road is going

butterfly girl

Oxnard, Calif. USA

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Posted: 03/18/06 07:55pm Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Very Cute....


"Wheresoever you go, go with all your heart."
Live life as a gift you unwrap daily

Sharon
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Poky the Dog...and Ally the Dog.. Both rescued dogs.
OUR RIG.. 1988 34' Bounder...
Rincon Beach, Ventura Calif
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joeg1455

Midlothian,Illinois

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Posted: 03/18/06 08:00pm Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Thanks for my laugh out loud of the day

needsomefun

Horse Creek, CA

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Posted: 03/18/06 08:19pm Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

That is a good one !!! [emoticon]

YrekaRVers

Yreka, CA.

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Posted: 03/18/06 09:29pm Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Thanks, I needed a good laugh.[emoticon]


I want to leave this earth calmly and quietly in my sleep like my grandfather and not like the other three screaming passengers traveling with him in his RV.">

sumerduck8

Virginia

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Posted: 03/19/06 07:04am Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Thanks for sharing!!!!





Hoops

Indiana

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Posted: 03/19/06 08:44am Link  |  Print  |  Notify Moderator

Cute

Becky


The Hoops. ED and Becky
Missy our little Bichon
2004 F350 V10
2005 Jayco Legacy 38RDQS


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